Just Breathe

It's a bit peculiar how many little things can go wrong around you at any given time or place. At first you might literally wake up on the wrong side of the bed, or the ATM might be closed for a national holiday you didn't grow up observing. Sometimes the little things are big little things, like when your host school drops the metaphorical ball concerning your class schedule for the fourteenth time in the span of three and a half months, leaving you clenching every muscle in your body as you feel the blood rush to your face and you try not to break your four front knuckles on the school-issued bedpost in your dorm, all because you were sure_no, positive that you had dealt with the administration's incompetence for the last time three weeks before you left. but no matter what may befall you, at the end of your hissy-fit when you have tired yourself out, you realize that nothing has changed about your situation, save for your blood pressure and apparent awareness that you are currently screwed. these things, as petty as they may be, especially suck when they happen abroad. there is almost never a short and simple answer to the problem, and even dealing with your cell phone issues seems to be a bureaucratic nightmare.

now, I'm no psychologist, but it seems to me that when the shit hits the fan, you'll be able to deal with the spray way easier if you follow a few simple steps:

1) take a deep cleansing breath, and accept the fact that you are more pissed off than even the time your sister Julia dropped your board and broke a skeg when a perfect August wind swell was about to come up the coast of the jersey shore. if you need to, grab a pillow, or a shirt and either scream as loud as you can into either, or wrap your fists up like boxing gloves and pound a flat surface.

2) Let everything go. there's more than one way to accomplish this, but i always found that much to the dismay of my poor recipient, venting about my issues never failed to extricate all of the simmering negativity pent up inside my angry little heart. find a blank piece of paper, or start a journal or a blog, and start writing about whatever it is that's getting you down. don't stop until you feel better. If you're really lucky you can find a live victim to listen to you rag, or even better, someone who has been equally as slighted as you, and the two of you can have a mutually fueled bitch session about anything and everything under the sun.

3) form a plan. as nice as expressing all of the negativity may feel, truth be told it doesn't usually get you vary far in your endeavor. the only productive way to handle the problem itself is to formulate a plan, based on a number of best and worse case scenarios which may or may not pan out exactly as you think. it's better to make a couple different plans, just in case one falls through. make sure to think about all of the little details contributing to your dilemma as well as ways to deal with each. and remember, people tend to be largely incapable of being flexible and compassionate most of the time, especially when you are dealing with governments, school administrations, and other such large businesses. keeping this in mind has always largely impacted the way i have chosen to deal with things when they have gone awry.

4) as incredibly tough as it may be, try to remain patient. with the above considered, the old expression about catching more bees with honey than vinegar is terribly true. as much as it is true that the people you have to deal with in these types of situations are largely apathetic and incompetent, they are still usually the only people with the power and capability to help you out of whatever bind you have found yourself in. biting your tongue and approaching these devils with the utmost kindness and respect is ALWAYS more effective than confronting them with poison on your tongue. Remember to never approach any situation with a hot head. you will inadvertantly make mistakes, and in a world where our lives are connected to the walls by power cords and our vains seem to pump more oil than blood, only someone very self defeating would react emotionally to everything that flusters them. the E-mails we draft and the messages we leave are PERMANENT, and once they are sent out into the ether they will remain there until it is time for them to be summoned upon to be used against their makers. so basically, be nice. people will be more inclined to help you if you are.

last but not least, make sure to GET OVER YOURSELF. in the grand scheme of things, nothing that happens to us really matters. but every minute we spend feeling bad for ourselves, or worrying about what will happen if we CAN'T extract 40,000 yen to buy the nice pair of geta sandals for our wives and mothers are minutes we will never get back. this is especially true if the issue really is petty, and most issues are way pettier than they seem to the chode experiencing them. With that said,when all is said and done, sometimes it really IS just best to give up and live.